Lately, I’ve been deep in facelift content - consultations, costs, and 12 months of obsessing over the right surgeon. Searching for the best five-figure facelift is stressful. Add to that a self-imposed year off injectables (yes, my face feels like it’s melting), and my mood is cranky.
But in the middle of all that? I’ve been neglecting other deep beauty + wellness rabbit holes my readers enjoy: Ozempic.
This past week Chrissy Teigen came out saying she used Ozempic for 40 lbs of weight loss. First of all, thank you so much for the transparency. Hooray! After one year of usage she was able to shed the baby weight that she just couldn’t budge.
Now, Vogue says everyone is secretly microdosing Ozempic. And I sort of have to agree. A few months ago I wrote with Jennifer Hanway about a “natural girl’s Ozempic stack.” I did start taking some of the supplements she suggested — and yes, they help. Especially the Berberine.
But here’s my dirty secret and honest reveal: I tried the real thing. For just one week. And it was glorious. Natural support is nice. But let’s be honest right? Nothing works like the real jab.
In my last trip back home to New York I was looking around and honestly, everyone I know seemed smaller. And they ordered less at dinner. Everyone just looked… so much thinner. I won’t lie - I was jealous.
But here’s the thing. I don’t want to microdose Ozempic. Vogue wrote about a staffer who microdoses every two weeks to control her binge eating. I feel like — well, if you want my honest opinion — I don’t want to use that as my crutch. I don’t want to be on yet another something-or-other. And I do read so much differing information on Ozempic that I’m pretty scared to build it into my regular life.
As I head into my late 40s, weight gain has become a constant topic among my friends. It’s not baby weight anymore — it’s midlife pounds, usually 5 to 15, though some more, some less. Either way, we’re all struggling to get it off.
Here’s my hot take: microdosing isn’t it — at least not for me. “Quick hitting” for a week was the real game-changer. Forget the slow drip; I’m talking one sharp reset and then move on with your life. And yes, every nutritionist and medical professional is probably rolling their eyes, clutching pearls at the idea of a “quick fix.” But here’s the truth: I dropped 4 pounds in 2 weeks, reset my eating for a week or two, and finally admitted what I didn’t want to hear — my metabolism has slowed, and I just need to eat less. Midlife metabolism is rude, but at least this gave me the reset to deal with it.
Disclaimer: I’m not a doctor, nurse, or nutritionist. I’m just a girl with a substack who’s curious (and sometimes reckless) enough to test-drive these things and tell you the truth. This isn’t medical advice — just my personal, one-week Ozempic experiment.
In this article, I want to cover exactly how this one week dose hit me, how it let me kickstart my larger weight-loss goals, my deep dive into peptides in general, and the big question: how is everyone getting their hands on this? It’s complex. And there is a huge grey market.
I’ll explain each one of these in detail below.
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